How to tell porn from art – the commonsense guide
VS 
You may not be aware, but being able to distinguish porn from art is becoming a rather fraught affair. In Australia, the artist Bill Henson took some photos of naked kids and it sent everyone nuts because it was PORNO! That’s right – PORNO. Far be it from me to argue with those who have decided that pictures of kids count as PORNO – I’m sure they know what they are talking about since they are the ones most likely to be jacking off to Kiddie rude bits.
Instead I’m going to equip you peeps with the absolutely necessary skills to survive in this crazy, reactionary world. After reading this post, you’ll know how to definitively distinguish art from porn. But first, in case you doubt the need of a such a guide, here are a couple of scenarios where it might come in handy.
Scenario One
You’re an uptight, no nonsense religious type that absolutely has no tolerance for PORNO. You’re at work and it’s your lunch break. You want to try and find some ART on the internet so that you can impress you friends and co-workers with your knowledge. You’re sitting there admiring this picture of the Venus Esquilina (pictured right) – when your boss happens past your desk. She gasps in horror at the monitor and shouts at you: ”That’s PORNO! You beast! Pack your things and be off the premises in five minutes!”.
Scenaro Two
You’re a lazy slob that sits around at home all day playing Call of Duty – when you decide to take a break to bust out some nasty and relieve some tension. But what visual aids to use? You hit the internet and pretty soon you’re fapping away to that hot image of the Venus Esquilina. Her tight, supple hips and pert tits really get you going. But your house mate walks in right in the middle of the deed. He says: ”Dude! You’re wanking to a picture of a statue! That’s fucked up, man.”
So how does one avoid scenarios like these? Well you follow this step by step guide that breaks it down into simple components for you to follow.
Step One
The picture on the left is PORNO. The picture on the right is not.
And were done! Thanks for reading!
AEOAOEAOEAOEOAEOAOEAOEOAEOAOEAOEOAEO!!!!!!